#152 Rebuild After Heartbreak: Ivana Care’s Bold Journey

What happens when you lose everything—your relationship, your home, your identity—but still choose to rise?

In this compelling episode of the Healing Through Love Podcast, we meet Ivana Care, a courageous woman who shares her extraordinary story of transformation after trauma. After walking away from a toxic relationship, Ivana found herself in a women’s refuge with a baby, one suitcase, and a commitment to heal. She left behind not only material wealth but the version of herself that tolerated emotional pain.

Through this episode, Ivana opens up about the real, raw, and often unseen journey of starting over. Her powerful story serves as a mirror for women who are in the midst of emotional devastation and wondering if joy, confidence, and purpose can ever return. Spoiler: they can.

Today, Ivana is a thriving Life and Transformation Coach, helping women worldwide through trauma recovery, emotional healing, and self-love. She combines her lived experience with practical healing tools like guided meditation, energy work, and somatic trauma release to support others in finding their light.

This episode is for anyone who's felt like giving up but chose instead to rise stronger. It's for the woman starting over. It’s for you.

🎧 Listen now. Begin again. Heal with us.

 💡 Three Key Takeaways from the Interview:

1.     Healing Starts with Self-Awareness – How to recognize your emotional patterns and stop repeating cycles after a breakup.

2.     Rebuilding from Nothing Is Possible – How Ivana transformed her life from refuge to thriving business owner.

3.     Pleasure and Power Coexist – Learn how reclaiming joy and confidence can accelerate the healing journey.

🔗 Subscribe, Like & Share

👉 Get Ivana’s free gift here: https://mailchi.mp/6e195aa39ca6/ivanacare#header

✨ CONNECT WITH IVANA

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61564219235151

Website: https://mailchi.mp/6e195aa39ca6/ivanacare#header

Transcript

Voiceover | 00:02
. Welcome to another episode of Healing Through Love. Each week, we share ideas, experiences and resources to increase the awareness of domestic and family violence and to empower survivors to grow and thrive. We talk with experts who share their advice. Or with people who have experienced abuse, no matter where they are on their journey. This is all about healing through love. And now, here are your hosts. Sharlene Lynch and Rose Davidson.
 Sharlene | 00:42
Welcome to the Healing Through Love podcast. I'm Sharlene Lynch and together we're shining a light on hope, resilience and transformation in the journey to end domestic violence. Each week we bring you an inspiring interview with change makers, survivors, advocates and experts who are making a difference in the lives of those affected by domestic and family violence. Whether you are on a healing journey yourself or you're supporting someone who is, This is a safe place for powerful stories, practical tools and heartfelt inspiration. Let's heal through love together. I'd love to introduce you to our guest today, Ivana Kerr. She is a life and transformation coach. Her journey into coaching began with her own personal transformation. I'd love to welcome her to the stage. Hello, Ivana. How are you?
 Ivana | 01:35
Hello, very well. Thank you for a warm interaction. I really appreciate it. And I appreciate your work as well. Thank you for having me.
 Sharlene | 01:43
It's so great to have you here. So now tell us a little bit more, if you don't mind, about your story, if you can. As to why you're now focusing on this area of.
 Ivana | 01:55
Life? I don't even know where to start but basically, I was in this strange fog disconnected with my body it's hard to describe I I couldn't navigate my life. It felt like my compass is broken and I couldn't feel in my body when my body says yes, and my body says no. And through that disconnection and through that inability to connect, know what is right and wrong for myself, for my values, for my priorities. I got myself in a situation in life which I couldn't even recognize and that was very difficult and through listening to podcasts, meditating, affirmations, I was trying to get myself out of it and that was pretty much the beginning of the awakening but to be honest it wasn't a awakening to a glorious ta-da It was awakening to actually very difficult moment and realisation that Who I thought was... My supporter, my help, my lover, my soulmate was actually someone who was not healthy for me. And that was very tricky. And as I started to see how it plays out and what dynamic we have in a relationship, and of course, how I play this role as well, how I can improve setting up boundaries, being the people pleaser, and how I always compromise and go all the way to meet other one's expectations or needs. While abandoning myself, I started to have a language. I started to have awareness. And that was day one of the work and journey I go through. It wasn't easy at start. And throughout awakening, I started to tap into my intuition and my inner voice, so we'll say.
 So the compass was suddenly fixed, and I could... Feel, yes, go for it. And no, this is and nor go this is a red flag in my body and on this journey, I not only could feel what I'm called forward for, but I test different modalities, different styles of ways of how healing works. As I mentioned, I did the affirmation work and meditations. I went through counselling and a lot of other modalities.
 So, through that journey, I... Gain a lot of wisdom as well as the inner voice and the inner voice started to tell me like now, you're ready. Do it for others.
 You know something and people start coming to you asking for, you know, friends and relatives and started asking for wisdom for help because they see that even though you went through something difficult, you were able to get yourself together. I started to realize that is my mission and I would like to share the knowledge, the insight. And the space that I could hold for others.
 So yeah, that's very short. It was a long journey through that healing. And yeah, love is a big part of the healing.
 So that's why I felt so connected to you. Work and mission in your podcast.
 Sharlene | 05:16
I love it. So, let's start by talking about boundaries. How do we know where we need to draw the line? How do we know? What boundaries we need to have, like talk. Boundaries.
 Ivana | 05:32
Very important question. And while I was, as I describe it in a fog, I did not have clearly defined boundaries. And that's why I was overstepping to take responsibility for someone else's feelings. And trying to kind of resolve everyone's problems by adjusting myself, just by shrinking myself, by making excuses, by compromising. And I didn't know where I was. I couldn't kind of feel it. There was this mud in between us. And that's what caused a lot of issues. And not just in a love relationship, but of course it could show up at work. It could show up in your family dynamics with your children or with your parents. With your siblings.
 So, it is a big part of, For someone who has that thought, it's so difficult to... You know, put the finger on it. Where is me? Where is someone else? I actually did reach out for help. It was through one of the podcasts I heard, and this lady just described it so well. And I just reached out to her, and she helped me untangling because sometimes those decisions and those feelings are very subconscious and we are conditioned to understand. Go all the way to help others. We condition to take our people's responsibilities because we used to do it as children and that's our strategy to survive, that's our strategy to nurture relationships. But if you get to the point that the relationships don't work, then... You realize, okay, well, maybe I can adjust. And as you are always adjusting in those relationships, because if you think the problem is you, I need someone else to help me because I knew that If it's only me questioning me, I always go like compromise my needs so I needed some I would say intervention to help to reset those boundaries and what I learned over time and it took me 40 years that no one has the right to make you feel guilty, foolish or scared.
 So, if you notice that someone in your life is repeatedly making you feel those three feelings, and that is a big feeling in your body, you can actually start noticing. You know their name, manipulating. It could be intentional, unintentional. And if you notice, you should have that conversation.
 So, people who are genuine and honest will kind of handle that feedback or try to improve on it. And people who benefit... From this dynamic will find it a little bit harder to see your awakened you and resetting those boundaries. And that's really difficult.
 So, I do recommend people who can't do it on their own to have someone to do the work with them because it is scary part. And sometimes that's what leads you to danger, right? Because if we're talking about domestic violence, and that was the word you used at the introduction. The time when you start setting the boundaries is the most dangerous part of the relationship.
 So, it comes with a disclaimer that you have to always be careful.
 Sharlene | 08:57
Absolutely. So you talk about trauma therapy and being trauma informed.
 So and you've got different modalities that you use. So do you believe that everybody has some level of trauma, even if it's birth trauma, and that's what they're recovering from?
 Ivana | 09:16
Yes, I do believe that because trauma is not how big it is. It could be something very little, but it's not how significant the event seems to be to another person. It's how significant it was in that moment for you. And if you had support, either from your parent, caregiver or friend or whoever was there in the moment, and your capacity to process those emotions.
 So it could be very genuine. It could be misunderstanding. It doesn't have to be intentional, someone hurting you physically or emotionally or any otherwise. But if you don't have the capacity or the tools to process in that moment the situation, you might fail. Have the trauma. It might be that you have a lot of little traumas over time, or it might be that you have a significant one, which are still held in your body.
 So, the body keeps the score, and the healing starts there. Just understanding it, processing those stuck emotions and vibrations in your body. And from there, like being able to go through that sensation because emotions are sensations in your body being able to witness with someone for example therapist counsellor or a friend. Being witnessed to handle those emotions, you're opening your body up. To have the capacity to stand up for yourself next time or react calmer or enjoy more joy or have the challenging conversation with your boss or whoever you have a difficult relationship with. It grows, your capacity grows, and your life improves with your ability to process difficult emotion. And I was just thinking, how would I describe like, what is the difference between feeling and feeling? The feeling or just kind of resisting to go there. And I had this insight today, just preparing for the podcast. And it's like the difference between your phone is ringing and you know, it's ringing, but you don't answer it. But if you go to feel the sensation all the way, If it's a sadness, if it's a grief, it's very difficult and you might feel lonely, but you actually answer that call. And even if you're scared, you go all the way in. You say, what are you telling me? What do I have to feel? And if you're scared to do it on your own, I recommend doing it with someone, holding the light and making sure that you feel safe and supported and who can take you out of there if it's too much. But by answering that phone, that sensation in your body that nudging feeling like feel the feeling feel the grief feel the regret feel the shame all the way then it takes you into to the other side, which is you realize that you didn't die. And you can release. And on the other side of this tanu, is the joy, is the peace, is content and love.
 Sharlene | 12:24
I love it. Okay, so you mentioned about intuition and having a point in your life where you did, you were not able to have that connection to vibration to frequency, and you weren't able to connect with your own level of intuition.
 And then going through this, well, as you said, it wasn't a ta-da, it was an unravelling really. And for most people, it is an unravelling, it seems to be only the ones that write the books that have the ta-da, because I think we'll have For most people is a an unravelling and then you slowly got that level of connection to your intuition and now you heavily rely on your intuition for how you help others heal.
 So can we talk a little bit about developing that intuition muscle?
 Ivana | 13:10
Yeah. I actually recently read an article about it.
 So I definitely put it on my website, or it is there. So, if anyone wants to read the full article about being on a carousel of abusive relationship, it's this very quiet sound, and it just keeps coming. And if you start arguing with it just goes away. That's how I described the first hints. Off having some sort of insight or some sort of knowing so it wasn't that it was there and it wasn't that I could argue back with it because as soon as I started argue back with this voice it just disappeared it's just like okay go again another round but as soon as I needed it and I was just like where are you I need help and there was no other voice I could listen to I was Not having a plan B. And I was just like, now I believe you, please guide me. I have no other options. The voice started to talk to me. He said, what you lost was something you can replace. Keep going. I've got you. And I had that strong sensation that I will be safe. I will be okay. And started like, exploring that because then you can go back and reconnect what is the kind of tone and quality of that voice?
 Like, do you remember hearing it before? So even if you're recollecting or going down the memories, You can kind of go like, yeah, there was when, you know, We were just relaxing and this voice told me, run. It's like, that was the sound. That was the tone. That was the energy. Why at quality of my inner voice and then collecting that information I could then realize when it comes again with it when it just says don't park here and it just guides me now I Or, yeah, on a daily basis, as you said, or with clients as well. And I can rely on it now because I gave it the importance.
 So, again, you can nourish it. It's relationship like any other. You have to cherish it, nourish it, put the trust on it and listen, be the listener as well.
 So that's how I cultivate my inner voice and my intuition and how I started to grow. Recognize what is the loud ego saying, You'll be fine. And what is the quiet voice who just says like, I don't know. Thanks, honey. Be careful. Thank you.
 Sharlene | 15:50
For our listeners today, if they're looking to enhance their level of intuition, I'm suggesting, Ivana, that they have quiet conversations with themselves and lift their level of awareness, step ego aside so they can build this relationship with their intuition like a muscle and then, you know, and so that they can have the conversations and lean forward and lean into their own level of healing, yes?
 Ivana | 16:19
- Yeah, you got it right, yeah. And if you don't feel the voice telling you how to behave in a relationship or how to show up in a daily basis, sometimes it could be the parking fine. It's like, " I knew it," and then go, "Like, how did you actually know that?" There is some sort of warning. Have I heard something or do I notice, like, how did it feel?
 Like, where did it come from? Because we are all different.
 So, some people are auditory. Some people could really like a tap on the shoulder.
 Some people have a feeling in their stomachs and people can have a feeling in their heart so unfortunately, we can't describe it for everyone. And that's why you have to connect with your own. And if you do, just say like, thank you for being there for me that time. I know I didn't listen, but I still appreciate that you tried to connect with me and the more you give it a space and listen yeah it could be through journaling as well some people start channelling once they have all connecting with their intuition once they have a pen in the hand and start writing so you can explore what works for you so yeah it's a journey and it's beautiful because you like exploring you. And once you have that best friend on your side, it's so much easier. I was.
 Sharlene | 17:36
Suggesting that intuition is connection with source. And you were suggesting that we have, depending on your Clare, if I'm getting this right, Correct. Depending on your Claire.
 So, the way that you connect to source will be how you'll get your message, whether you'll feel it, see it, just hear it, smell it even. I don't even know if that's a Claire, but we can create one. And so, and that's how you connect to intuition and your likening intuition to connection with Yes.
 Ivana | 18:11
Source. Yes. Yes. Yes.
 Sharlene | 18:14
Okay. And so now I understand that you're offering for our listeners today a beautiful healing gift of a 45-minute connection. Can you explain how that works?
 Ivana | 18:23
Yeah, so I offer a free breakthrough session, which would be 45 minutes, which will help you to connect with yourself. I like to do... Just deep dive into your story, understand, make you feel heard, make you feel, share your story because for a lot of us starting to share the story is unpeeling the shame. Because until you tell someone, the shame keeps you in darkness, alone, isolated. And the first step could be just have someone who has the capacity and the wisdom and the ability to hold the space for you, which could be itself very healing.
 So that could be a good start. But I do provide kind of what could be the steps forward, what could be some suitable for, modalities or tools which can help you to start with your healing journey so yeah I love connecting with people and hearing their story so that's a complimentary gift for your listeners as well as if they like to head to my website they can download five steps to bounce back after a breakup or separation which is like a very how would I describe it detail guide to give you five different steps and what tools can help you on each step. I won't go in detail through all of them, but it's different for When you're letting go and you're in this phase of, let's say, grieving or forgiving yourself for how long you stayed and et cetera. And if you're then in a different stage, more maybe getting ready to explore roots of why you show up in a relationship like that.
 So, there are layers and steps. So, I created the guide just to help you to. Have a view of the journey and have the tools along the way wherever you are.
 Sharlene | 20:25
Well that is so generous Ivana and Ivana's links you'll find in the show notes and in the show description. If you're listening today and you are a survivor of family and or domestic violence reach out to Healing Through Love. We have pamper days in your local area here in Adelaide and Sydney we have them in the States, Hong Kong and there's a few other places as well. Reach out to Healing Through Love and we'll connect you to the dates and the times and the details for you. Your local area think day spa on steroids so you as a survivor come for the day and our beautiful practitioners hold the space for your healing you get you can have your hair done your makeup done you can have massage you can have your chakras aligned there's all sorts of things happening and it is a beautiful experience and if you're listening today and you are a healer and you've got a heart for change, please reach out to Healing Through Love and we'll connect you to an organiser in your city so that we can shift this conversation on family and domestic violence and we can put an end to it by having the conversations, lifting the covers and really helping those stand in their own power by realising you have a choice. And you do have the power, and you can connect to your intuition and it's a beautiful way to connect. Thank you so much, Ivana. This has been a lovely conversation, and I look forward to connecting with you soon. But just in closing today, I'd love for you to share with our audience your final words of wisdom.
 Ivana | 22:00
Yeah, you opened the space for nurturing people who are in a difficult situation. And my message is for those that the healing is possible. It's not your fault. No one deserves to be abused in any way.
 So it is very difficult, but it's not your fault. There is help. I didn't do it myself. I reached out for others. And thank you. Thank you so much. For giving the voice to women who've been through this experience and I'm so grateful that we have this platform and this opportunity to speak up about such a difficult topic and it's so very brave that you're all out with this work because yeah it totally changes people so many thank you Goodbye.
 Sharlene | 22:44
Thank you Ivana for your generosity that's a goodbye from me and a goodbye from Ivana.
 Voiceover | 22:54
Thank you for joining us for this episode of Healing Through Love. You can get further resources See the show notes or simply reach out to us via our website at htlaustralia.org. Thanks so much for joining us and we look forward to your company next time on the Healing Through Love podcast.