#156 Build Self-Worth & Intentional Living with Becca Stackhouse

What would your life look like if you treated your relationship with yourself as the most important one?

In this enlightening episode of the Healing Through Love Podcast, Becca Stackhouse-Morson, the visionary behind Stacked Intent, joins Sharlene Lynch to explore how building a strong relationship with yourself is the foundation of all meaningful transformation.

Becca’s journey to unapologetic authenticity spans over 20 years. As a Certified Family Life Educator, yoga instructor, and founder of a wellness-focused life education company, she helps people understand that self-care is not a luxury—it’s a necessity.

Listeners will hear how tuning into your inner values, setting healthy boundaries, and cultivating emotional awareness can shift your relationships, mindset, and quality of life. Becca shares actionable strategies for developing self-worth, embracing personal growth, and staying true to yourself even during life’s most challenging transitions.

Whether you’re managing chronic illness, navigating evolving relationships, or recovering from burnout, this episode offers a roadmap to reconnect with your inner power and create intentional change from within.

When you invest in yourself, everything around you begins to shift.

🎧 Tune in now to discover how powerful it is to become your own safe space.

📥 Subscribe and share

✨ CONNECT WITH BECCA

 Website: https://www.stackedintent.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/stackedintent

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/beccastackhousemorson/

Blog: https://www.stackedintent.com/blog

📍 PROMOTION:

https://www.stackedintent.com/resources

♥ ♥

Transcript

Sharlene | 00:00
So excited for you to join me on this beautiful conversation with Becca. We dive into having a better understanding about who it is that you are and how you can turn up so that you can lift in and lean into having that level of acceptance and having that level of awareness so that you can move forward. This is a beautiful conversation. Join us for 20 minutes where we dive deep so that you can know yourself better. 

 Voiceover | 00:27
Welcome to another episode of Healing Through Love. Each week we share ideas, experiences and resources to increase the awareness of domestic and family violence and to empower survivors to grow and thrive. We talk with experts who share their advice or with people who have experienced abuse, no matter where they are on their journey. This is all about healing through love. And now, here are your hosts. Sharlene Lynch and Rose Davidson. 

 Sharlene | 01:05
Welcome to the Healing Through Love podcast. I'm Sharlene Lynch and together we're shining a light. On hope, resilience and transformation in the journey to end domestic violence. Each week we bring you inspiring interviews with change makers, survivors and advocates and experts who are making a difference in the lives of those who are affected by family and domestic violence. Whether you're here on a healing journey or you're supporting someone who is, this is your space for powerful stories, practical tools and heartfelt inspiration. Let's heal through love. Today we've got a very special guest. Her name is Becca Stackhouse-Morson. She's founded Stacked Intent. She's going to dive in and explain what that is to help individuals become their most authentic selves. Together through this life education business, she provides tools and strategies for self-care and personal growth, believing that a healthy relationship with yourself improves every aspect of your life. As the CEO and founder of Stacked Intent LLC, Becca is a certified family life educator. And there's just so much more I could go on. But over the last 20 years of experience with personal growth, and she doesn't look that old. Just saying Becca empowers others to navigate their life's changes, whether it be managing health, relationship, finance or well-being, all while staying true to themselves. Hi, Becca. 

 Becca | 02:35
Hello, thank you so much for having me today. I'm excited to be here. 

 Sharlene | 02:38
It's beautiful to have a conversation. And I understand that to get to where you are right now, there's got to be a story.
 So Becca, are we okay to tell the story of how you got there?
 Becca | 02:49
Yeah. So my business, I kind of always wanted to own a business, but the relationship side really came through... I grew up in a house that really encouraged us to understand our relationship with ourself, love ourself, not really put an emphasis on romantic relationships, but building friendships, building who we were. 
 And then as I kind of watched it, there were a lot, there's friends that didn't have that. There's friends that typically bounce from one relationship to another. Or different aspects like that. 
 And then when I went to school, my bachelor's is in social sciences, and then my master's is in family studies. And then for six years before I opened Stacked in Tent, I worked as a county extension agent, which is in the US, it's a leg of the land grant universities. 
 So every state has an extension, a university that has extension. And so I did that for six years and, I worked with anywhere. I worked with little pre-K kids, but I worked with middle schoolers. 
 And then I worked with married couples or I worked with single parents who were having to go through some court ordered education so that they were meeting their requirements. And in all of that, these middle school kids, I just really saw that. Their education came from their home styles that weren't always that great. 
 I mean, we lived in a very impoverished county. And so the kids' home lives weren't always great. And so they either got it from home, which were typically very unhealthy patterns that were taught to them. Or they got it from our media, so our music, our TV shows, our movies. When you really dissect some of that. Things like your domestic violence, abuse, unhealthy relationships. It gets romanticized to be okay. And so I just really found this drive and this passion to make sure people understand that. Healthy is an option. Having a healthy relationship is an option, whether it be a romantic partner, friendship, coworkers, whether it's your relationship with family, or whether it's that relationship you have with yourself. And it starts with the self. Because if we don't have a healthy relationship with ourself, then we're going to accept all kinds of things from other people for sure. And so I just really found this drive to be a healthy person. To want to help people with that. 
 And then I got married in 2022 and we decided to move. And so I decided making lots of changes at the same time sounded like a great idea. 
 So I launched my business then. And so I've been on this journey of building Stacked Intent to provide the resources and the tools through online courses, workshops, retreats, just all different ways for people to absorb information of understanding the different ways relationship affect our every single day. 

 Sharlene | 06:09
Wow. I love that because it is one of the hottest subjects is relationship and whether it's relationship at work, relationship with ourselves, relationship with others. You're right. You're right, Becca. It does start with a relationship with ourselves. It doesn't really. 
 Well, yes. And as a woman of faith, for me, it's a relationship with God as well. 
 So I love this. And I went to the States. It's fascinating. I went to the States for two years as a child, and I was in, and I don't know if it's middle school, I would have been nine and ten and eleven. 
 So is that middle school? 

 Becca | 06:45
I get real confused with which ages, but I think that might be later primary middle school. 

 Sharlene | 06:53
All right. So then I was in the States during those formative years. And what I noticed is how different education in the States was than it was in Australia. And it was a culture shock to me to have... Very different experience because the education system is so different is that I was put advanced a year when I got there and when I got back I was put back a year so it's just a strange environment I sort of totally missed year five in the process and that's okay I still obviously survived but yeah education is very different all around the world And look here in Australia, we do put a lot of emphasis on the children having a great understanding of particularly boundaries and how to say no as part of their education for not having things happen to them that shouldn't happen to them without going through all the How does that expand out to us understanding no and boundaries and those sorts of things? 

 Becca | 08:06
Well, a relationship with self really starts with you. Having self-awareness. 
 So like really understanding what your thoughts are, your feelings are, your behaviours, your motivation. And it's being able to look at it from an outside view of like being able to kind of remove yourself and go, okay, I understand why I thought that way. 
 Like I'm in my 30s. And so now looking, being able to understand and look back, okay. Because... Are Our before the age of seven is when we develop a lot of our. What we know how we're going to react our habits and it influenced a great deal is we're an adult. And so it's being able to go, I'm reacting that way, either because I learned it as a survival. That was my survival during that period of my life. Or it's what I learned in my environment. And so it starts there with that self-awareness. It's being able to have some self-acceptance because that's being able to look at what your strengths are, but it's being able to look at what your weaknesses are. Because you can look at strengths all day long, but if you don't look at the flip side of it, then you're going to struggle a little bit because you're still not looking at what that is exactly. 
 And then it's looking at being able to look at that self-care. And self-care, In my opinion, self-care gets such a bad rap because self-care people think, it's the I got to go do the extravagant thing. When self-care can really be as simple as what you physically need. 
 So what do you need to physically exercise? And that can be anywhere from you have a gym membership that you go, a class you go to you're taking a kid to a ball game and you walk the field while they're practicing. 
 So it's being able to have self-care in your mental space as well as your emotional. And I look at self-care as simple as it may even just be having the... Laundry put away or the dishes put away. 
 Like those are acts of self-care too. It's being able to look at the self-love. It's being able to forgive yourself of like, this is what my past might've looked like. How can I move forward? 
 And then it goes back to that setting boundaries and that setting, learning how to say no, because when we say yes to other people, you're saying no to yourself in some way. And so it's considering, okay, Is that something I really want to say yes to? Or is it not? 
 And then it's looking at being able to, That's learning how to protect what your time is, what your energy is, what your goals are. And so that's where a lot of this self-relationship comes from of it's just learning to understand yourself without outside voices. 

 Sharlene | 11:08
I love it. I love it. 
 So as you say, it starts with that level of awareness and then. It steps into acceptance. What are some of the practices people can do for our listeners that is going to help them with that level of self-awareness? 

 Becca | 11:24
If you've never had it before, you just got to start. If you've not had a self-awareness or a... Making it okay to listen to yourself. You just got to start. And in that, you have to understand that sometimes, it's uncomfortable. 
 Like, looking at your strengths all day long, that's a comfortable place to be sometimes. But looking at what your weaknesses are, that's not always comfortable because you might have to acknowledge when you said something wrong to somebody, when you didn't react right, when you could've handled a situation better. And so you might have to sit in some level of being a little bit uncomfortable while you get to a level of being able to understand yourself. And so it goes back to really looking at what your values are and looking at what's important. 
 Like for me in my day, it's really important for me to get my rest. It's important for me to get up and do my journaling and rest. My devotional and then my exercise is important in my day and then spending some time with my husband. 
 So when I balance those three out of my day. It those become my bigger priorities in the day and so it's learning what your priorities are and what you need them to be. And knowing that seasons of life, they're going to change. It's going to adjust and it's going to shift. 
 Like my devotion journal time. It is something that from the age of like seven years old, I have done at night. And I would go to bed sometimes at like eight o'clock, but like stay up another two hours and do it. But when I met my husband and we got married, so... Had that habit for 22 years. And when we got married, it didn't work for it to be at night anymore because it's when he and I got to talk. And so. It took me a year and a half to figure out. It's like, I have to have this. 
 Like it's important in my day, but it doesn't work where it's worked for 20 years. So now. I help him get off to work and then I do it after he goes to work. And that time really works, which switching it to morning was an adjustment, but. I needed that. I knew I needed that. And so it was important to refine that time. And so that's it. It's finding the things that are important for you in a day and finding where they can fit in your day so it doesn't become an overwhelming task, but you understand where you need it. And it's going to help you build a stronger relationship with yourself because you're meeting your own needs in a healthy format. 

 Sharlene | 14:09
Absolutely. I love my journal and same. 
 So I got married in 2023. So that's late in life. I'm 58 now. 
 So I left it a little bit long, but that's okay. Each thing in its own time. But my journaling, yeah, it's really been a godsend for me to be able to have the conversation with myself because that's what the journaling is a conversation with myself and then allow me to lift that level of awareness around my triggers around the things that maybe I wasn't turning up as well as I could do to really dive into the patterns of behaviour that I'd had for a really long time that were not serving me and weren't going to serve me to move forward. 
 So I love journaling. It's made a huge difference in my life. 
 Something that I've been doing for a hot minute, well, since my son passed away, is I've been re-journaling. So and this is because working through that grief process, sometimes my journaling wasn't actually making any sense at all. It was me just having the grief conversation. Conversation and getting things out. But just at the end of a week is going back through all of the journals for that week, and then re journaling it into something that's a little bit more concise. And it allowed me to really distil what it is that was helping me with my transitions. 
 And then at the end of the month, I look at the four or five for the weeks for that month and then at the end of the year I look at the 12, which is a concise revisiting of all of the months of the year. And it really has made my end of year process about reflection and looking forward and setting goals and intentions and everything else, it has refined it to a different level that's meant like really cosmic expansion really. And so yeah, if you're if listeners, if you're journaling, consider re journaling. It has is a powerful tool. But absolutely. Becca is starting the journey of awareness is having those beautiful conversations with without journal because it's sort of private. I remember when I was a little girl, mine had a lock on it. And I used to lock it up. 
 And then I used to hide it. And then I'd hide the key. But things have changed now. It's okay. I love it. I love it. Okay. 
 So we've talked about this level of awareness. So the next thing is this level of acceptance that you talk about. How do we, you know, warts and all bad stuff, shadow stuff, all the stuff that's not necessarily amazing. Yes. And it's still who we are and what we're doing and what we sort of behaviours we've put together to get us where we are. And as you say, survival mechanisms, how do we shift from this level of awareness into this level of acceptance? 

 Becca | 16:57
I do think journaling really helps. Journaling helps finding a friend that's trusted to talk to, finding a professional to talk to, just having some of those people. But it's looking at... Your thoughts. It's looking at what your feelings are and it's tracing it to what those behaviours are because a lot of times our behaviours come from a feeling or thought. And so it's just those things and it's being able to look at even what your imperfections are and look at it all laid out without having judgment on yourself, without being harsh with yourself, because that can just be such a challenge is if you're being harsh on yourself, then you're not going to be able to You're going to struggle with accepting because. We all have different parts of ourselves that have either been through a rough spot, have had a challenge. We may not have responded well because we either didn't have all the information or we had a different storyline in our head of what was going to happen for the rest of the day. It's accepting what you do. It's accepting how you react, taking control of it, but then being able to turn it back around and. Have that foundation of confidence in yourself and self-esteem and it starts with building that foundation and it's never too late to find what that foundation needs to look like for you and it's it it's being able to build that and so it's. Being able to find it. The ways of It may be that you're needing to be mindful, so mindful in a certain area of your life. Self-talk. I think that is one of the biggest ones of like self-talk because I we can say more than 90% of what we say to ourself can be negative. We're one of the worst critics for our own self. And so it's starting to... Capture the negative self-talk and turn it into some positive and encouraging statements. And one way that I've done that throughout my life is I write on my bathroom mirror. 
 Like I used to share a bathroom with my little sister. And so she'd just get to see all of the bathroom writing. And now my husband gets to look through it sometimes. And so it's just being able to reframe for yourself something that's positive so that you're not just sitting in the negative because that's an easy place to get stuck if we allow it and if we let the people that are the closest in our influence if they're negative and then we'll adapt that on ourselves as. 

 Sharlene | 19:42
Well. I love this. This is so rich. 
 So yes, now I want to know how forgiveness plays into this level of acceptance. Are they two individual things? Are they the similar process? How does forgiveness work to shift us through that level of acceptance? 

 Becca | 20:02
Forgiveness is being able to either look at what's happening presently or look at what the past is, whether it was a past relationship, whether it was a past version of yourself, how yourself was in a relationship. And it's being able to look at that past, learn from it. And instead of dwelling on it, You make that learning. You don't dwell on, well... Either poor pitiful me, or I'm just this way because this happened, but it's being able to go, okay. Maybe dissect it a little bit and look at, okay, This, it may have just been, if you... You could look at a friendship. There was a miscommunication that happened. And that's you. And so you didn't necessarily respond right because there was a miscommunication. And so it's being able to accept that, maybe come back to that friend and have a conversation about it. And if you can't, it's just being able to accept that it is what it is. And don't repeat the same cycles. 
 So change it in a next relationship or a next friendship that happens. In your future. 

 Sharlene | 21:17
I love it. It's so true. 
 So wow. So these are lots of beautiful tools and techniques. And it starts with having that level of awareness, and then the level of acceptance, and then beautifully weaving in the forgiveness. And you know, from what I hear, what you're saying is it's playing above the line, not below the line, and having that awareness. Taking on the level of responsibility is what I'm hearing you say, so that we can actively take a responsibility for how we've been, let's call it programmed till now. And what's, you know, and diving deep into our values so that we can make more valued based decisions to move forward. I love it. This is a beautiful conversation. I think we could chat all day, Bec. 
 So I look in as a If you're listening today and you're a survivor of family and or domestic violence, we host pamper days. So think day spas on steroids where you come in. It's completely free for you. You'll experience facials, massage, your makeup done, your hair done. You might have your hands done. 
 So a pedicure and a manicure. You might have your chakras aligned or I don't know, pick a therapy. We have 25 different practitioners at each of our events and the experience is free. For you for the day, just so that you can show how much you are loved. And we hold the space for you to show what's possible for you. If you're listening today, and you're a practitioner, and you've got a heart for change, and you're like, you know what, I can spare a day to hold the space for people to heal and show their true value and move forward, reach out to us healing through love is now global. And we run these beautiful pamper days all over the world. We'd love to connect to you. Now, Becca, back to you. I'd love to. Add just your final words of wisdom to our audience today. What are your final words of wisdom? 

 Becca | 23:08
I would say that one of the biggest things that I kind of discovered was that it's important to not allow yourself to vanish. And so it is finding the things that are important to you and finding the true way of how you want yourself to be and what matters and in that self-relationship, not allowing yourself to vanish. And doing that through relationships, through transitions, through, I mean, going from singlehood to marriage, from no children to having children, from like high school to college, or even from being a parent to becoming an empty nester. And so it's being able to constantly check in with yourself and have ways to grow. Check in with who you are and who you want to be as you move forward. 

 Sharlene | 24:08
I love it. I love it. Thank you so much, Becca. This has been a beautiful conversation. It's a goodbye from me and a goodbye from Becca. 

 Voiceover | 24:19
Thank you for joining us for this episode of Healing Through Love. You can get further resources See the show notes or simply reach out to us via our website at htlaustralia.org. Thanks so much for joining us and we look forward to your company next time on the Healing Through Love podcast.