#165 Break Free & Get the Love You Deserve with Angie Biln

What if the love you’ve been longing for starts with loving yourself?

In this heartfelt episode of the Healing Through Love Podcast, we welcome Angie Biln—Women’s Empowerment Coach, Registered Clinical Social Worker, and domestic abuse survivor. Angie shares her deeply personal and professional insights into breaking free from toxic relationships and reclaiming the love you truly deserve.

With 18+ years in social work and a lifetime of lived experience, Angie introduces her three foundational steps from her program, Get the Love You Deserve. This isn’t just another talk about healing—it’s a roadmap for transformation.

Together, we explore:

• How to rewrite your internal narrative
• Setting and upholding emotional boundaries
• Recognizing unhealthy relationship patterns
• Rebuilding your life with clarity and courage

Whether you're just beginning your healing journey or seeking support to break free from limiting beliefs, this episode delivers practical tools, deep empathy, and an empowering call to action.

Angie’s approach is grounded in evidence-based techniques but delivered with compassion and relatability. Her story reminds us that healing is not only possible—it’s powerful. By embracing authenticity, self-respect, and clarity, women can move from surviving to thriving.

🎧 Tune in to uncover what’s holding you back from healthy love—and how to step into the life you were meant to live.

 📣 Subscribe to never miss an episode!

📩 CONNECT WITH ANGIE

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/angie.gill.400880

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/angie-biln-45910561/

Website: https://angiebiln.ca/

♥ ♥

Transcript

Voiceover | 00:02
Welcome to another episode of Healing Through Love. Each week, we share ideas, experiences and resources to increase the awareness of domestic and family violence and to empower survivors to grow and thrive. We talk with experts who share their advice. Or with people who have experienced abuse, no matter where they are on their journey. This is all about healing through love. And now, here are your hosts. Sharlene Lynch and Rose Davidson. 

 Sharlene | 00:42
Hello? Welcome to the Healing Through Love podcast. I'm Sharlene Lynch and together we're shining a light on hope, resilience and transformation in the journey to end domestic violence. Each week we bring you inspiring interviews with change makers, survivors, advocates and experts who are making a difference in the lives of those affected by domestic and family violence. Whether you're on this healing journey or you're supporting someone who is... This is a safe place, a space for powerful stories, practical tools and heartfelt inspiration. Let's heal through love together. I love it. And today we've got a very special guest with us. We've got Angie. Hi, Angie. Angie is a passionate woman's empowerment coach and registered clinical social worker. With 18 years, and she does not look old enough, 18 years experience guiding women from surviving to thriving. Angie combines therapeutic insights with transformational coaching to help women reclaim their power, heal from trauma and embrace lasting change. I love this. What sets her apart is that she's walked this path herself, bringing not just knowledge, but lived experience, empathy and real world tools with a focus on resilience, authenticity and self care. Angie creates a space, a safe space for women to truly feel seen, heard and supported. Hello and welcome Angie. 

 Angie | 02:15
Thank you so much for having me. 

 Sharlene | 02:17
It's such a privilege to have you. And I feel like kindred spirits already. 
 So it's fantastic that you're working in the social space. Yes. And why do you have a heart for something that let's face it, it's a challenging career choice. 
 So tell me your story. How did you get here? 

 Angie | 02:36
Yeah, so as you mentioned, I'm a registered social worker. And a certified life coach. 
 So I've been doing this for almost two decades. So I've always had a passion to help. And I knew that in my early 20s, when I went to university, I said, you know, want to do something in social work or psychology, or I'm helping people. 
 So naturally, I took that path. And it just felt right, it really resonated. Along the way, as you know, we hit stressors and challenges in life. I was in a very unhealthy and an abusive relationship. 
 So I was married for 14 years and the relationship was very toxic. My partner at that time was abusive. He was an alcoholic. 
 So the marriage was very, just tumultuous. And the interesting thing is that, you know, I go to work day in, day out, helping women, helping other survivors, giving them safety plans, walking. Down the path so that they could have freedom and choices and safety. But then I'd come home, and I would be in this situation where I couldn't help myself. And, you know, it was like that for a long time, probably almost like a whole decade. And so it got to the point where, you know, eventually we separated, we parted ways and I just. 
 You know, I had to do something where I was like, I need to one help myself but be in a position where I can really truly guide and navigate these women to know that they're not stuck, you know, to know that they have choices because they're Obviously, if I felt that way, I know there's going to be tons of other women who feel that way. So it just felt really... Close to my heart. My passion now is to really work with women who have suffered trauma, unhealthy relationships, toxic relationships, who are at that point where they see two roads in front of them, but they just can't make that choice. And they feel like they're stuck or alone or... Or maybe just not, you know, maybe just there's mental health issues such as depression or anxiety holding them back. 

 Sharlene | 04:31
I love that. And you're speaking to the old me as a survivor. And if we dial it back to when my transformation happened, you know, I didn't get it necessarily right the first time I continued to make. Not strong choices, even though outwardly, I looked like I was doing better, I was in a different financial space, I was helping other people, but I still made some really not very supportive decisions about who I partnered with. 
 So let's dial it back. So when you're working with women, are you looking at like a values level? Are you looking like, let's get your life purpose sorted level? Are you looking at your stories about your self-esteem and your self-image? Are we dialing back to that level? 

 Angie | 05:28
Yes, great question. Because that's where it starts, right? We have to be able to, like you said, dial it back, almost think of like an onion, we're peeling it, you keep peeling away. Because what I realized in my own healing journey, which I had to do, I didn't want to do it. But you know, at some point, you're faced with do I want to become the best version of myself? Or do I want to stay stagnant? And, you know, I think that's a great question. 
 You know, after so many years of suffering and just being unhappy, I was like, I'm ready for change. Like I need to do this for myself, but for my children. 
 So I did my, I started my own journey, which was inner child work. And I know you're familiar with it, but if our audience or listeners are not, you know, that's really going back to those moments where you're a child and looking at some of the events that took place and how did they affect us? And what are we still holding on to that still lingers? 
 Like there's a lot of emotional stuff that comes up. So that is something that I teach, that I've specialized in, that I teach my own clients, but it's something that I had to go through. 
 So what I would say is, you know, you really have to be willing to go back. Go back to that little girl version of you and see when did I become, you know, when did the insecurity start? When did that low self-esteem start? When did I start attracting these unhealthy relationships and people into my life and why? 
 So if we start asking the whys, that's when you're going to be able to really discover who you are. And what I find when I work with women is we often lose our identity. 
 So I have a lot of my clients who women who come to me who say, I'm not a woman. I don't know who I am anymore. 
 Like, you know, I was this person once before where I had a passion, I had talents, I had, you know, interests. And now I just don't know who I am. I've lost myself because of this relationship, or because of these struggles and abuse and whatever the case might be. 
 So for me, I'm not a person who's been in a relationship for a long time. I'm not a person To answer your question, yes, we have to go back to that. Younger version of yourself and really close and heal those wounds because some of them are so deep that they still will be in our mind and body and soul and they will keep coming up until we deal with them right so we can't keep suppressing so we have to deal with that childhood stuff. 

 Sharlene | 07:29
Yeah I love it you're speaking to me so I know that even though I'd started moving forward and I was still making not so brilliant choices for me it was awareness. So having a level of awareness and asking questions about, is this what I really want? Is this okay? And like I continually check in to make sure, is this all right? And am I heading in the right direction? 
 So like having that guiding star, having that, you know, that compass to find your true north and connect with that level of why. Even with that in place, sometimes I still fell off the bandwagon. 
 So if you're listening today, listeners, and you know, you've taken two steps forward and it feels like you've taken five steps back. It's OK. This is a journey. And there's so many layers to unpack. Exactly like you said, Angie, an onion to unpack. 
 So like many of our listeners, they love tools and techniques. They love things that are going to give them an instant response or an instant gratification and so that they can test and measure and help move forward. 
 So talk to us about some of the things that you teach your clients that might be in one of your courses. 

 Angie | 08:52
Yes, exactly. And so as you were speaking, you know, you mentioned kind of the red flags topic. 
 So that's big, because what I always teach, and I think what I want all of our female clients to or an audience to know is that we all have intuition, we all have, you know, these gut feelings that come up and a woman's intuition is so strong. But the question is, why do we choose to ignore it? Because we've probably all gone through that, like, you know, I saw like, tons of red flags, hundreds, thousands of red flags, and I just kept choosing to ignore them. And I did this for many years. 
 So and I know you probably went through the same thing. So I think One is be compassionate towards yourself because we cannot change the past, but we can start to release it. 
 So a lot of my clients just say, well, how do I do that? Okay, well, one thing that I would say is super easy that we can all put in our toolbox is breath work. Okay, so belly breathing is amazing. 
 You know, a lot of us probably have done it through yoga and things like that, but that is huge for me because. That is what really grounds and calms our nervous system, right? 
 And then when you have a calm mind, body, soul, you're able to think with clarity and make rational decisions versus. Doing things impulsively or reacting on anger or emotion-based decision-making. 
 So that's not going to help you when you're in a fight or flight situation. So again, the things that I would teach my clients is let's really get down your grounding exercises and get them down pat. 
 So breath work, meditations, journaling is huge. So journaling is great because one, it's a source of energy release, right? We're able to transform what our mind is going through and put it onto paper. 
 So it's actually healing. But at the same time, it's actually very important thing to do if you're in a violent situation or a domestic situation, because that journaling is actually going to. Confirm some of the events that took place in case you ever have to go to court. 
 So great opportunity is to journal because again, it's good for your mind, body, soul, but You may need it in the legal system if it goes down that road in terms of your relationship. Other things that I teach is really, it's a three-step program that I teach. 
 So. Inner child healing, which I've already mentioned, then we focus a lot on core programming. 
 So that's the why do we do what we do, right, really understanding it, and then rewiring it. And the third is, as you mentioned, value. 
 So value base is huge. It is like the foundation of the way we operate, right? 
 So you have to know what your values are. There's no right or wrong, my values will be different than yours. But you have to know them and then align with them because when we align with our values, then we live a life that is full of purpose and it feels fulfilling. But if you're living in chaos, you know, you're not aligning with something. If something's off because you're constantly struggling, you're living in chaos. 
 So for example, My top value is respect. And now when I look back at the old me, did I live, in life where my partner and I respect each other? Absolutely not. There was no respect. 
 So I tolerate that for many years and In reverse, I was not being respectful either, right? Because it just got to this point where there was no actual respect in the relationship left. 
 So I'm not aligning with one of my top values. So what happens? I'm stuck in this marriage. I'm unhealthy, I'm unhappy. I'm not sleeping, you know, I'm anxious, I'm feeling depressed, all these things, I'm isolating myself. And so I'm creating this chaos and I'm literally attracting it into my life. 
 So fast forward to today, I would say, ladies, like really get clear on your values. If you know what they are, start aligning with them. If you need help with that, that's where people like myself come into. Play where I can help guide you, navigate you down that journey, and then create boundaries. 
 So that's that last step of my program is how do we create healthy boundaries and it's not as easy as it sounds because. Sometimes we just say a boundary, but okay, what are you going to do to actually follow through, right? There's an action plan that has to go and be implemented. 

 Sharlene | 12:42
You're speaking my language, Angie, where were you when I was in the thick of it all? And listening today, you know, listeners, this might sound, yeah, I've got this, I've done that. 
 Yeah. And my question to you is, are you living it? Are you living it? 
 So have you embedded these values? Do you even know what they are? And if you do you turn up using them? And boundaries like look that's even about the simple things in life so if some if one of the kids they're supposed to be making the bed you let them get away with it where does that end up so boundaries are not just boundaries with significant others it's boundaries with your work should you be being paid more like there's so if you really need to have that level of understanding what your boundaries are and then sticking to them because as soon as we slip from them we give ourselves permission to slip from other things as well and then it becomes a cascading effect I love it I love this so would you mind telling me a little bit more about the program because we talked about this before the podcast our audiences would love to know. 

 Angie | 13:53
Yes, of course. So I offer a one on one coaching package. I do group coaching. I do corporate coaching. 
 So, you know, if you're at all interested, you can find me on socials, find me on my website, AngieBellum.ca. But what I teach is really exactly what I've been through. 
 So the one thing I will say is, My clients are all amazing, beautiful women, but you know, I have an authentic story that I love to share. It didn't come easy. It's not easy sharing your story when it's so vulnerable and sensitive, but I'm expressing that because I do know that my clients will often say like, I'm really nervous to come to you. I'm really nervous to open up. I'm scared of what's going to happen. And you know, that's why there's people like you and I here is because it's showing you that change is possible. It's showing you that you can rewrite your life story. If you're ready to take that step and really do that one-on-one coaching or that group coaching, that's what I offer. In addition to that, I do have my own podcast. I am in the process of writing a book. 
 So there's other things, but I guess my... The main thing that I want to share is you're not alone. I know I felt alone and I'm sure other women feel that way, right? Where you just feel like you're stuck and there's no one to help you. But. When I say that I've actually lived it, I did for almost two decades. And now I'm here, you know, and I'm able to share my story for a reason, because I want to make sure that it connects with one person or 10 or however many to let you know that you're not alone. And you do have the right to live a, an amazing life. 
 Like, you know, you are worthy, you deserve the best life and you deserve love and happiness. But to your standard, not because of someone else or how, you know, how you've been living or because of what's been dictated or. Given to you or, you know, you have a choice. 

 Sharlene | 15:38
I love it. I love it. I love it. If you're listening today, and you are a survivor of family and or domestic violence, reach out to Healing Through Love. Because we have pamper days. 
 So think day spa on steroids that are our locations near you. Now as a survivor, they're free. And we have them not just here in Australia, but we have locations around the States and Japan and a few other countries as well, where we have these beautiful pamper days. 
 So we're 25 beautiful people. Beautiful practitioners get together and hold the space for you for the day for free. 
 So we have hairdressers, makeup artists, we have facials, they have chakra lining, they have massage, you name it. Think day spa, they've got it. And these women themselves are holding a space because they themselves are survivors. And they're a testament to what's possible when you move forward, when you do programs like Angie's and you lean into that level of community. And if you're listening today and you're a practitioner please reach out to healing through love we're always keen to connect practitioners to the local organizers of our beautiful events it's i love it it's the reason why we're here it's the reason why we run the podcast to support and give cause marketing to those who make a difference to this space of holding the proximity for survivors of family and domestic violence and showing them what is possible when they move forward. I love it. I love it. I love it. 
 So Angie, look, we could talk all day. But I'd love to know, in your final words, like, what would be your final words, your final? Words of wisdom. 

 Angie | 17:18
Yeah, I would say Courage. Courage is something we all have. 
 So don't think that your courage has been diminished or taken from you. You know, we all hold a power and I want you to just think back. Think back to that little girl. What would she have wanted out of life? Because... All of us have aspirations. We all have these dreams and things that we want to do and want to become. And somewhere along the lines, things get taken from you for whatever reason, right? Or we suppress them. But I want you to really think back to that little girl. 
 And then remember, you do have this light inside you. That's called courage. And if you're ready to act on that courage and take that step forward. You're not alone because there will be wonderful providers, practitioners, you know, other women who are willing to help you and guide you through this journey where you're going to be loved and supported. 
 So I think, you know, what you're asking about words of wisdom would be definitely that we all have courage. We all have this power to rewrite our life story. 

 Sharlene | 18:14
I love that, Angie. And you know, courage just starts with one decision. Courage just starts with, you know, maybe I'm not ready to leave now, but maybe I'm ready to listen to a podcast and find out how to create a plan or be brave enough to tell someone what's really happening, or to reach out for professional help or to set up a separate bank account, like whatever it is that you need to be doing to help you move forward. And sometimes that courage just starts with one decision. Starts with you having that internal conversation you know what this is not okay and I'm worth more what would that look like so we hold the space for you today listeners if you're taking those steps of courage I love it now to reach out to Angie you'll find her links in the show notes and in the show description I encourage you to lean in and keep an eye out for her book that's a goodbye from us at Healing Through Love and a goodbye to Angie. 

 Voiceover | 19:15
Thank you for joining us for this episode of Healing Through Love. You can get further resources, see the show notes, or simply reach out to us via our website at htlaustralia.org. Thanks so much for joining us and we look forward to your company next time on the Healing Through Love podcast.